Sleazy Old Men, Tattoos & "Ute-Gate"!

Often times things in life are not what they seem. Likewise, people are not always what they seem and what they say can be equally duplicitious. This week this white man stumbled on three random examples of pure charlatanism - one at his gym, another in the news and the final example in this nation's parliament. What do they prove? Simply that there are no bounds when it comes to two-faced people talking total rubbish for their own questionable means.

After a good work-out in my gym yesterday, I took a spa with most of the usual pool-users around 10AM most mornings. My spa companions consist of a regular group of 50-60 year old Greek/Italian men who, at the best of times are raucously loud and generally mischievous. A pain in the Speedos but generally harmless. Most of their conversation always reverts to their mutual 'admiration' of the few young females who enter the pool/sauna/spa area whilst they are there. Yesterday a young Filipino woman, a new member apparently, came into the spa whilst the most boorish of these older Mediterranean sleaze-bags was there. Talk about Casanova's most lecherous demon suddenly manifesting in the flesh! If this old rat could have bent over backwards any more for this poor unsuspecting woman he truly would have been kissing his own backside! It was a disgrace - the old sleaze was all over this woman - even offered her a back-rub in the spa. And if you believed this 'gentleman' it was simply just his hospitable nature welcoming this new lady to the Ascot Vale Leisure Centre Aquatic area. What it really was was just a gross opportunistic sleazy advance on a young woman who I doubt will ever take a spa or sauna again at the centre. Remember I mentioned that not many young women use the spa area in the morning between 10AM - 1PM? Now you know why! Simply sleazy lies!

Then I hear on the news today that the Belgian girl who suffered the apparent indignity of having half of her face tattooed while asleep(?) and claimed that she hadn't requested all those stars actually lied. She wanted all 56 stars on her face, for reasons I wouldn't know, but when her father expressed his horror at the situation then she concocted the "negligent tattooist" story. When I first heard about this story I immediately smelled a rat as I know that nobody, unless you're completely anaethesized or on some other drug, falls asleep during the process of getting a tattoo. And so her truth came out in the end and the tattooist, who himself resembled nothing less than a human freakshow, was vindicated. Lies and more lies!

And finally, when you look to your nation's governmental leadership for a good example of decency, transparency and honest sincerity you get "ute-gate!" It has been established now by an Aust Federal police investigation that someone in Canberra thought it would be a fine idea to implicate the Prime Minister Kevin Rudd and the Treasurer Wayne Swan in a "funds for friends" type scandal that involved a fraudulent email and all sorts of political skullduggery. In short, someone lied in their attempt to smear Australia's leader and all fingers are pointing towards the Liberal Party. When the controversy first aired, the Opposition Leader Malcolm Turnbull was very pro-active in promptly suggesting Mr Rudd immediately apologise for this "scandalous error of judgment" and resign. Now Mr Turnbull finds the tables well and truly turned and he himself is being asked to pen his resignation over this fake effort to besmirch Mr Rudd and the ALP. Lies, lies and more lies!

Eventually your lies always find you out. It's simply a matter of when. Whether it's a lecherous old Greek geezer in a spa, or a naive silly Belgian woman with a faceful of potential regret or some yet un-named public servant responsible for what will prove to be one of the most infamous 'brilliant' cunning plans ever to backfire, the point is the same. Two-faced lies ultimately reveal their source to be exactly what they are - basic liars! The truth always comes out...Funny that, considering we all live under the watchful eye of a Creator God who, as one of His inherent divine qualities states, is TRUTH! When will people learn?!

My Hillsong Hiatus...

In a couple of weeks many young people in my church and other church-goers will be making their annual pilgrimage to Sydney, NSW for the Hillsong Conference. Over the past three years, this white man has accompanied the masses to 'megachurch Mecca' and, if really honest, gained a lot from the conference experience. So coming up to this time of year, I have had many youth presume that I'm again going to be a guest of the Houstons in the first week of July. And they have appeared slightly bemused when told that this year I'm not going. I have explained to many that I need to be around this year for planning purposes re. our own church's National Youth Conference at the end of this year. True in some part but not entirely. So I want to explain the real reasons I'm not going to Hillsong Conference this year...or to any Hillsong Conferences in the foreseeable future for that matter!

First, this year the headlining keynote speaker at Hillsong Conference is Joel Osteen. For those unaware, Osteen is the pastor of America's largest church, Lakewood Church in Houston, Texas. He is also one of the most outspoken apologists of the "prosperity gospel". In essence, this man holds the belief that the strength and sincerity of your Christian faith is inextricably linked to the state of your assets and income. In other words, the stronger in faith, the richer in wealth. It is the view that God's grace isn't just a reflection of your forgiveness, salvation and righteousness, but is tangibly linked with his blessing on your life in terms of your material prosperity. There is no other warped twisting of God's Word and Being that infuriates this white man more than prosperity gospel thinking. I've never once heard of any legitimately struggling, materially poor person of God spruiking prosperity gospel nonsense. I guess it really must only be the wealthy Kingdom-dwellers who are most blessed - Jesus must have 'unintentionally' left that one off His Beatitudes list! So with Joel Osteen headlining Hillsong Conference this year there is no chance I'd be supporting him or his ministry team in any way, shape or form.

Secondly, I have had a gutful of Hillsong Church themselves and their adherence to all things prosperity gospel. As a church they boast an annual income in excess of 50 million per annum. And I acknowledge that it is their money - what they choose to do with it is up to the church leadership in accordance with the agreeance of those members who make their own choice to give their titles and offerings into Hillsong. I guess I have just come to realise that they really don't need my paltry once-a-year offering of my time and money into their conference coffers and, more the point, I don't need to offer it. Actually, to be more precise, I don't want to offer it! I know Hillsong have more than enough people in their fields 'sowing seed into their harvest'. My seed would be better sown elsewhere. If there is a more materially-driven body of Christ in this nation than Hillsong Church then I'd like to know about them! They are as much prosperity gospelists as Osteen and Lakewood Church - perhaps just not as prosperous?! Yet!

Lastly, last year Hillsong Conference finished on the usual high it does on a Friday night with a praise & worship celebration night. The highlight of which was the appearance of one Michael Guglielmucci who, complete with oxygen mask etc... performed his renowned worship song "Healer". Following this, with 20 000 other attendees mostly in tears, including myself (unashamed to admit that given I cry once-a-week on cue when watching Find My Family!) watching on, Guglielmucci was prayed over by some of the most famous Christian speakers today. Of course this all happened before the sensational revelation that the whole Guglielmucci terminal cancer story was simply an elaborate, if not confusing hoax to deflect attention away from his real confessed condition of having a pornography addiction. Anyway, as far as I'm concerned there are two issues that I still cannot reconcile regarding the whole Guglielmucci scandal - if Hillsong church and their leadership are meant to be the 'spiritual giants' and 'front-runners' of this nations collective local Church with supposedly the most spiritually-intune Christians in their fold then why did not any of them discern or detect some issue with Mike Guglielmucci's situation? Was the devil just way too sneaky when it came to Mike and his 'cancer'? And secondly, I have seen few, if any sincere attempts by Hillsong to maturely and positively deal with the scandal from their end. Yet all it seemed they were interested in was pulling their CD's with his songs on them off the shelves so as not to tarnish their precious name. Constant trawling and copyright restraining of Youtube downloads of the song "Healer" also make Hillsong look bullyish and petulant. What I have still to reconcile in myself is that I was present, I was witness to and I was spiritually moved by what ended up being one of the greatest church shams this nation has ever seen in recent times. And for that, at this time at least, I am unwilling to return to the venue where I was duped and played for a fool.

So this white man isn't attending Hillsong Conference this year. By no means is this a protest against Hillsong and my views must not be taken as authoritative and even definitively correct. They are just my views - nothing more, nothing less, take them as you please. And as I said before, I won't be returning in the foreseeable future. I never say never because who knows; maybe one day Hillsong church might begin to see past the collection plate and return to what I believe is a truer essence of Christian living - something like what Micah spoke of in 6:8 - that is living out justice to the poor, loving mercy and walking with God in humility. So there it is...bye-bye Brian and Bobby...have a 'richly' blessed conference!

The Return!

The white man has returned! Sound the anthems, blast those trumpets, brush the webs off the podium for this white man's one month sabbatical is over! Now, having got that opening self-indulgent diatribe out of the way, time for some truth-telling. The truth is this - this blog space, this haven from the buffeting waves of life had not been fulfilling it's proper purpose. Rather than being a therapeutic outlet for the whinges and whimsical wisdom of the white man, this blog had become a circus of superficiality for nothings sake. Don't get me wrong - I enjoy the lighter side of life as much as the next clown but if this blog is to mean anything to it's creator then it has to be true to the sensibilities of the creator.

Hence, one difference in this renewed white man's world is that there will probably not be an entry every day. How quickly a tool can become the master - the self-induced pressure to put something on here on a daily basis was unreasonable and ridiculous. That's why much of late April and early May was 'devoted' to vacuous pictures of kids stuck in toilets and so on...that was reason enough for this white man to take a contemplative break from a world slowly becoming a joke. Again, be rest assured that this world isn't going to transform into a 21st century version of the book of Lamentations. There'll still be those lighter moments, for the what the wise one once said still holds true; if you don't laugh you'll cry! But there'll definitely be more reflective wisdom, poetic masterpieces (in the poets mind anyway!) and theological commentary.

That's all for now - the white man looks forward to making his world here a better place, a more sincere place and a realm he feels happy to be king in once more!